Working with Families who have decided to Separate
I work with families in Lewes and Brighton who have decided to separate and need guidance on how best to manage this
Making this decision causes a range of feelings, some expected and some not. Uncertainty and change can be exciting or frightening. I can help you with this.
When shall I tell the children that we are separating?
How and when to tell the children - this will depend on several factors; age, what they already know, whether you and your partner can agree on this and what is happening in your children's lives at this point.
I may have to tell both sets of grandparents and I know they will be upset. Shall my partner and I tell our own parents?
How and what to tell friends and family - this will influence future relationships and is important.
My husband wants to tell the children about his new partner, I'd rather wait
Remember you and your husband are probably months ahead of your children in adapting to the changes, they will need time to come to terms with the news that you are separating and be anxious about what that means to them.
Reassurance from you both is needed that they are loved and you will try hard to make it as ok as possible.
We have been angry and arguing but since deciding to separate we've felt calmer but very distant
Decisions of this magnitude are usually a long process and you may both feel some relief. This is also part of a process and you will have a range of feelings to navigate over the next few months, this is normal.
I can help you to think these difficulties through and devise a framework or plan that will help you.
I'd be happy to talks things over with you in a telephone consultation to see if I can help.